Warning: Walking slowly may lead to cardiac arrest....of the person behind you

Ahhh Thailand, the land of white sand beaches, the lazy swing of a hammock, gentle breezes and Singhas in the sun. The hot weather, the endless smiles and the constant desire to lay back and take it easy has inspired many a backpacker and local alike to turn things down and notch and just take in the scenery. For many, including myself, this seems like the perfect philosophy to live by. However in a bustling city like Bangkok, this speedy farang with places to go, appointments to meet and a general need to get a little bit of exercise has discovered that this lacksadasical outlook on some aspects of life has led to a deadly epidemic which has swept across the country. The infection rate appears to be close to 100% with Thais appearing to be the main carriers of this cruel condition. As of yet there is no cure and carriers seem completely resistant to any type of treatment.
What is this condition you ask? The ever dreaded: "I'm-Thai-so-I-walk-slower-than-any-other-human-being-while-me-and-my-friends-are-chatting-and-taking-up-the-entire-sidewalk-then-I-stop-without-warning-and-start-texting-my-friend-itis".
While not deadly to the carrier, the ailment has been known to cause great discomfort, pain, stress and sometimes near death experiences in unsuspecting foreigners walking behind infected individuals.

As a person who has dealt closely with infected individuals over the past years I beg the medical community of Western, acceptably fast walking countries to help cure Thailand of this national plague before more foreigners drop dead from frustration as they atttempt to get from point A to point B while trapped in the death grip of the slothlike herd.  Let's work together to find a happy medium and save people such as myself from the pain and frustration of this terrible condition.

....or maybe we should start handing out free rollerskates.....

Cheers from the unmoving mass
J