And you were thinking that I would actually say yes?!?....

From the mouths of men come the oddest things. Mid-twenties, well off, fashionably dressed men are a strange breed indeed. I, for the most part, don't particularly like the well off, fancy shoes, SUV breed of twenty somethings who roam the streets of Vancouver on Saturday nights. For the most part I find them pompous, spoiled and out of touch with reality. Would I date one? Hell no. But, I must admit that my palette is diversifying and the thought has crossed my mind that maybe I should jump off my "East van represent, if it ain't cheap and dirty I don't want it" high horse and wet my fingers in the Perrier pool of men. This idea quickly came crashing back to reality last weekend as I had a lovely encounter with the smooth young men of money and social ladder climbing.

Picture this, young miss Joe, dressed quite sassily heading home from a lovely night at the lesbian bar where she danced the night away and avoided all things attached to penises. She stops at a corner downtown to wait for a cab. There is no one else around, under the Georgia viaduct by BC place. Up pulls a very expensive looking, shiny white SUV with rims and tinted windows and all that fancy ass shit. Down rolls the window, young man, mid twenties, button up shirt, metrosexual hair blowing in the late night breeze.

"Yo bitch wanna suck my cock!"

How the hell I'm I supposed to answer a question like that? I mean seriously, what if I had said, "oh boy, do I !!!!" and bounded into his 80,000$ environmental disaster? What the hell is this guy trying to prove? Not only did he think he was pretty damn cool spurting forth his cool "ghetto lingo" by calling me a "bitch" (personally I think hoe would be much more effective) but all his homies in the car thought he was pretty cool too and proceeded to high five him. That's right boys, wow he is one cool ass dude.

I am not a feminist, in actuality, feminists annoy me. All their man bashing and "I'm not a piece of meat for you to gnaw on" mentality bores me to death, but I must admit that this little incident tweaked that whisper of a feminist that lingers in us all. I didn't reply to his tempting offer, instead I just gave him the finger, but I must admit that as I did, a wave of fear swept through me and I began to quickly run though what I might do if he and his buddies got out of the car and decided make their dreams a reality whether I was in on it or not. Luckily for me they just screeched off, basking in the glow of their pig-headedness while I unclenched my fists and continued to wonder "what if they didn't". It pisses me off that tools like those guys feel that they can just pull that shit whenever they want.

Boys from the East side don't usually act like that. Being poor usually humbles people and makes them realize that they can't get everything they want including some random chick on the side of the road to suck their dick. Richie Rich and his sidekicks clearly have spent their entire lives getting whatever the hell they wanted and having their egos and dicks stroked to the point where they feel that they are so high and mighty and so deserving that they can just yell out dumb ass shit like that whenever they so please.

So to the boys in the SUV - fuck you.
Fuck you for freaking me out
Fuck you for treating me like a whore and most of all, Fuck you for making think like a feminist...God, so fucking annoying.

Cheers from the headquarters for reluctant feminism
J